It's Never Gonna Happen
by JustMe88
Summary: Lily Evans and James Potter hate each other, so only two things can happen if their forced to live together in the head dorm, the first is death, the second, well... that's not gonna happen...


Disclaimer: Every character you recognize comes form someone else's head, mainly J K Rowling's. Every song I mention and every place you see that you've heard of, aren't mine.

This chapter has a lot of description of Lily and her friends, I'm warning you now, and the next one will probably have a lot of description on James and his friends. I've decided to write this as if it was set in this time frame, cuz it is way to hard for me to try and get in to the 70s state of mind. It's kinda short now but it's the first chapter so leave me alone. Hope you enjoy.

A lily for a Lily

"Homework, robes, cauldron…." This is what could have been heard if u had been passing by the second bedroom, on the second floor of 18 Dewberry Lane, somewhere in Britain, "make-up, pjs, wand…. wand…. Mom! Where's my wand!"

"Check your hair dear," was the replay that was sent up from the kitchen.

The person currently living in the aftermath of the tornado, that had only struck the second bedroom, on the second floor of 18 Dewberry Lane, felt the back of their head and sure enough came away with a 14 inch stick, "thanks mom!" The person, was more commonly known to the world as Lily Evens, and only to a few as "the person", and only in conjunction with other words such as, "the person who is the bane of my existence…"

A scream floated up from the kitchen, along with the smell of frying bacon, and a "Lily, honey! You have mail!" Lily ran down the stairs, stopped in the doorway of the kitchen and did a quick sweep with her eyes before they settled on the brown mass of feathers her father was feeding bacon to. "Horn!" Lily screamed when she saw the owl, "Horn" was not the owls' real name, but its true name may have been inappropriate for her to shout in front of her parents. The real name of the owl was "Horny" and belonged to her friend Angela or "Angie", when Angie first got the horned owl they couldn't decide what to name her. Vicky, who had named her Snow owl the creative name, "Snowy" had had one of her famous moments of stupidity when she suggested the name "Horny", the name however, stuck.

Perhaps I should backtrack a bit, Lily Evens along with her three best friends, Angela Kayhill, Grace Suite, and Victoria Clare, had been attending Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry for the past six years and were about to embark on the seventh and final year at the school. If you are not familiar with the school, it is probably because you are a muggle and have never read a Harry Potter book, in which case I am forced to wonder why you are in the Harry Potter section of is a school of magic where they teach everything from transfiguration to the art of dodging dung bombs thrown by your peers. This is the place where the four best friends met. Lily, Grace, and Victoria in year one, and Angela in year three, when she transferred from an American school. Lily was the angelic one of the group, and was always encouraged to bend the rules a bit by her three best friends, she followed all the rules, this may have been the cause fer her intense dislike of a certain James Potter and his group of miscreants, but that will come later on in the story. Lily had curly red hair that fell down to the bottom of her shoulder blades, and piercing emerald eyes, she was easily one of the most attractive girls in her year; her only competition was her three best friends. Lily was sweet, so long as you didn't upset her, if so she was one of the few red heads that gave the rest of them their bad name, "fiery" I believe is the term they give them. She was also the Head Girl for their final year.

While the four fit together like pbj…and… well, something else that goes with that, they couldn't be more different. Victoria had long, straight, jet-black hair, and deep brown almost black eyes. While Lily, Angela, and Grace were known for being some of the smartest students of their year, Victoria's brains were masked by her inability to think before she let something come out of her mouth and then failing to realize what it was that had come out of her mouth. Everyone knows someone like this, they could be one of the smartest people you know, but they seem to have the capability to say the world's stupidest things. Another difference between the four of them was the degree of outgoingness, while Angela and Grace were incredibly outgoing, Lily was only outgoing so long as it didn't break any rules, and while Victoria's rather dim outbursts might alert you otherwise, she was rather shy and reserved.

Angela was the third member of the quartet. She had a little longer then shoulder-length blond hair and blue eyes, she was quick to speak, but knew, for the most part, when to shut her mouth. She had by far the quirkiest personality of the group, and was known for her sense of humor and her ability to draw a crowd to her, she was, by definition, "a people person." Angela, like Lily, also had a bit of a temper, but while Lily would make you feel like crap by screaming at you when you made her mad, Angela took revenge in a slightly different way, by public humiliation, so I suppose she made you feel like crap too, but in a way that made you want to hide under your covers till it went away.

Grace was the final member. Few people knew her name was Grace Suite, unless they were around when she got one of her friends mad, then the name was screamed across the common room. The reason few people knew her name was because she didn't like it, she claimed it was a generic name and that the only reason she had it was because her parents were too tired after five kids to come up with a better one, that they hadn't already used. She preferred to be called "Quiana" or "Kay" for short. While she chose a nickname that was exotic, her looks where not, though very attractive, you can't really achieve exotic with brown curls and brown eyes, just girl next door. Anyone who has four siblings knows perfectly well that in order to be heard you had to be able to get your voice heard over the masses, but also that if you yelled to much you would get the snot beat out of you by a bigger sibling, so while Kay was outgoing, she could also be reserved. Kay was also a sucker for bending the rules, and while she had a sense of humor similar to Angela's few realized this because of her great dislike of being surrounded by people, after leaving a house with five kids, you want _your_ space.

So these are four, out of the six, seventh year, Gryffindor, females, the other two, Nicole and Christine, are relatively unimportant. I however, should get back to the story.

Lily raced for the owl and snatched the letter away from her outstretched leg while listening to, "Honestly mother, what if I had had a friend over and we had an owl just swoop into our kitchen like that? Huh? They are disgusting creatures and…" Oh did I forget to mention Petunia? Petunia was Lily's older sister, though both found it hard to believe that they had anything in common at all, including blood. Lily tore open the letter…

_Dear Lilybear,_

_How are you! I miss you so much! Spending the summer in New York has not been fun, spending it indoors babysitting my 80 year-old grandmother, only served to make it worse. The highlight of the trip was during her naptime I got to lay on a beach chair outside and work on my tan, how sad is that? And before you even think of saying, yeah, but you get to go shopping in New York City, don't because I have told you before I'm no where near New York City, and the only place I have to go shopping is Old Navy. I am going insane here Lils, I never thought I'd say this, but I can't wait for school! Speaking of school, congrats on Head Girl! Though I can't say I'm surprised, you practically sleep with the rulebook under your pillow, no offense. Can't wait to see you on September 1st! Lots of love from your American comrade,_

_Angie _

Lily couldn't help but smile as she looked at the letter, it was August 31st, meaning tomorrow she would see all her friends. The letter was dated August 29th, meaning Horny had taken her time in delivering it. "Come on Horn," Lily said holding out her arm, "You can bunk with Rochelle tonight, no sense in sending you back to the U.S. now." Horny gave Lily an affectionate nip and perched on her arm.

"Lily dear, do you have all of your stuff packed for tomorrow?" her mother asked while cracking some eggs on to the skillet, you know that we are going to have to leave early tomorrow if we want to beat traffic, and remember that you grandparents are coming over tonight to see you before you head off."

"Everything's practically packed," Lily lied to her mother, "and Grandma Ethel and Grandpa Henry come every year to see me off the night before I leave, I'm not going to forget."

"Alright, well go up and finish packing then, and get that owl out of here before you sister has a heart attack."

"The owl shouldn't be in the house at all mom!"

"Now listen Petunia, we've been through this a hundred times, that's how witches and wizards communicate, we use the phone, and they use owls.." Lily's father, who had been sitting there, watching the exchange spoke up.

"But dad…. It's just not natural…" was what Lily heard as she turned and ran up the stairs to her room, leading to a very unhappy Horny. "I'm leaving tomorrow… tomorrow, tomorrow," Lily started singing to "I'm following the leader" from Peter Pan. Horny flew from her arm to the second perch set up in her room from when her friends' owls stayed the night. Lily walked over to her collection of cds and pulled out one of her favorites, "an oldie but a goodie" Lily muttered as she popped it into her stereo, Angie, a fellow muggle born had gotten her addicted to this group…

"IT'S BEEN ONE WEEK SINCE YOU LOOKED AT ME! COCKED YOUR HEAD TO THE SIDE AND SAID I'M ANGRY…" started blasting from her speakers. Lily grabbed her brush and started singing along while jumping up and down on her bed.

"Hope I'm not interrupting anything kiddo," came a deep, baritone voice from her doorway.

"Hey daddy," said Lily with a smile.

"It looks like a bomb went off in here," said her father tip toeing through the mess on the floor to make it over to the bed, " You need to make sure this is clean before you leave or you mother is going to clean it." Both Lily and her father pulled a face, knowing perfectly well that Mrs. Evens' cleaning involved new paint and a lot of items trashed.

"Listen honey," said Mr. Evens finally making it over to the bed, "this is your last year at school…"

"…and we know that after school your not going to want to spend a lot of time with us old geysers," came her mother from the doorway.

"I thought I was going to have to start without you," her father smiled at her mother, he turned back to Lily, "Anyway, the short of it is, we decided to get you something so that while your away from home you'll still know that we love you."

By this time Lily's mother was all the way in the room, "Here," she held out a small box to Lily, "Open it," she urged her with a chuckle.

Lily slowly opened the lid, inside lay a beautiful lily on a delicate chain, "A lily for a lily," her father said with a smile.

Lily threw her arms around both her parents, "Thank you so much," she said in a low voice, "I love you guys so much."

"Yeah remember that when we're old and you need to take care of us," said Ms. Evens with a laugh.

So that's the end of chapter one. Tell me what you think down below by pressing the "REVIEW" button, you can't miss it.


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